We all like to be in control
of various situations in our lives; especially the situation of being alive.
Meaning we all like to live and we expect all our loved ones to remain alive
with us. We like to
have a full preview of our lives with all the pit falls and highs and lows. Many of us don’t even start new projects because we don’t have the entire blue print. We go nuts trying to figure out how to make a project successful.
The truth is we can only set
our hearts to believe in the best and expect good things to happen if it is in the will of
God. There is a dialogue in the movie – Left Behind part 3. The hero and
heroine say their goodbyes before going into their respective mission fields in
the middle of World War 3 and the hero encourages his new bride
enthusiastically saying “Honey we cannot die until God decides to end our lives!!!”
(to which she responds, with a half humor half pain look, “Thanks honey that is
so romantic”).
We all are part of the generation
in which Tsunami became a household word in India. I know personally a family
which suffered loss during tsunami. They were a couple from North India on
their holiday trip to south. And their only child wanted to see the beach
before catching the train back home. They were there when the
first monstrous wave hit. The father and child survived. The mother died. How
do we explain why they were in
that particular place on earth at that particular time? And what should we
conclude from this? That the best way to stay alive is not go to the beach???
The other day I was at the
beach.... men on horses, young couples
strolling, children playing, parents fussing over their wards and a plane
flying overhead. Just like all the people around me I too looked up at the
flight making its way slowly across the sky. Then I suddenly realized I am just
part of the landscape to the people on board the flight. We usually wander
around with a unique sense of self. We see ourselves
from within. All our thoughts are about me, mine, or something concerning I. On that day I relearned that We can live our lives wanting to make
ourselves unforgettable, important or we can accept the fact that we are part
of the landscape and try to be a beautiful human just to make the world at
large a beautiful place.
Invariably, the ocean
brought me memories of our dead comrades. I have seen navy personnel for many
years. They always seem so much in control, strong, valiant….. I cannot imagine
them dying. They are larger than life men. How can they die? How can superheroes die? When I called my husband after hearing the news he was so level headed. (or at least he sounded
that way). He sounded 100% sure that nothing bad would have happened.That
is how men in the Armed forces are trained; hope for the best and have an
ability to digest the worst. Always ready to forget the risk they are in and give
assurance to civilians. That is what a man should be.
Shakespeare said “A coward dies a thousand times before his
death, but the valiant taste of death but once. It seems to me most strange
that men should fear, seeing that death, a necessary end, will come when it
will come.”
An unknown someone gave this answer in 'yahoo answers'.....
I love this answer. This person has so succinctly described what you and I should strive to be – A hero/heroine; not a sniveling coward
whose one aim is to stay alive along
with his/her family for a long time. Instead we must hope, we must do our part and not complain, we must get up each
day and thank God for it, we must live each day to the fullest so we have no regrets
and we know we have given it our best.
I have set my heart today to live
a full life. I don’t know how that is
going to get done but I expect God to teach me. I choose to face the unknown
and say “Bring it on!!”. And I hope dear reader that you will join me if you
are not already there. God bless.
hey....want to ask you something...i love him and he loves me.but he takes me for granted.he comes back from office.talks to me very sweetly and then would say i want to go for run or something else.when he'll come back he'll say.m very hungry and tired.want to sleep.i know he has his own life .i should let him do whatever he wants.but in this whole process i m not happy.i need hos attention.he'll call me whenever he gets time from office and talks to me but just for 4-5 mins.ok he is busy but what is the problem at home.then he has 1000 things to do.we had a fight last night.he said if i try my best i cant make you happy.but i don't need anything except his time.half an hour in a day atleast. The time which is only mine and he is not doing any other task at that time.i don't know who is wrong or i am becoming more demanding.but i m fed up of fighting and want a solution now.please please please tell me what to do.most of time he is occupied because of his job and in rest of the time he has his hobbies or something else.he talks to me but for 5-10 mins in between all these activities.if i say anything then he'll say i always give you time but i am not happy.please tell me the solution.waiting for your reply
ReplyDeleteHi,
DeleteIt is your husband’s duty to give you quality time. Marriages suffer due to lack of communication and sound communication takes time. The reason your hubby is not totally “with” you is he is preoccupied with his job. When men are stressed and preoccupied, they think it is OK if they are physically around and mentally absent; whereas women feel neglected when their spouses are lost in their own world. Solution? – If he just got transferred recently then he’s probably trying to learn the job and adjust to the new personalities in his work place. Give him time. And don’t take anything personally. Use, honeymoon photos or special gifts he had given or notes or special songs – whatever it takes to remind you how much he loves you. Then make sure you use time like Saturday evenings or some chance where your husband doesn’t have office the next day, to make a BEAUTIFUL date. Candle lights, music, privacy, and the works. The change in atmosphere will help him detox from his office environment and focus on the most important person of his life – you. God bless.
hi..u r doing very nice job.i recently got married to naval officer.my husband's senior invited us for dinner.i was thinking what kind of gift should i take to their house.den i remembered u r d one who can give me somd suggestion.nd are their any dinner rules to be followed in official parties.and one more thing can you please tell me how to behave in nwwa functions.what happens in such function.i am little bit nervous.help me
ReplyDeleteHi.. A bouquet or a box of expensive chocolates is good. At any new place make it a point to talk less, observe more and laugh (inoffensively) at anything remotely resembling a joke. This behavior will put you and everyone at ease. You’d probably be attending the party with other young wives. Find the one who behaves most casually and make light conversation; you won’t be making solid friendships or anything so keep the conversation simple and easy; just plain talk and goodbyes. Don’t forget to compliment the hostess and thank her for having you over. In official parties…. Remind your husband (my husband mysteriously forgets this in every party) to introduce you to all the officers esp. his seniors. Be very polite yet dignified even if the officer is 20 years older to you. When the CO and his wife arrive stand up and greet them. Don’t be pensive if nobody is talking to you at first. Conversations tend to pick up slowly and heighten during the dinner and more during dessert. :) If you are being dined-in/out then you’ll need to approach the buffet table first. Apart from this there aren't any rules that I know of. Do have fun though. Parties are the very essence of navy. And the style and élan are incomparable. Enjoy to the hilt. NWWA meets are easy compared to official functions –don’t arrive there alone, club with another lady who is attending the function as well. It’ll be a regular meeting with welcome address, speech and interaction among officers’ wives and sailors’ wives. Nothing much for us to do unless there is any call for participation in an upcoming event; then make sure you commit to things you are capable of doing. Hope this helped.
DeleteI am in with u :) And pray to God to teach us :)
ReplyDelete