Be a leader

The word “leader” always invokes a mental image of a very strong person, looking determinedly into the horizon. He has a purpose and a lot of people working towards a common cause.

Well he’s not the one I am talking about. I am talking about normal people like you and me.

My first definition of a leader is a person who can bring out the best in people including his/her own self. That is, they go and take charge of their future, put in maximum efforts and thrust into the journey towards their goal.

This I assumed was a good enough definition of a leader. But was it?  

Many strong people who have everything by the world’s definition are wrecks inside simply because they have no hope. They crave for love and encouragement but sadly receive very little. The world around us doesn’t function this way any longer. People don’t always give us love and encouragement. Many people don’t have the time or the inclination. And many don’t know what we are undergoing and hence they remain aloof. So, that means we have to look for a constant source of love and encouragement. And Thank God that He has provided that, just the same way He has provided oxygen, food, water and sleep.

God Himself is the source for Love. The Bible says, For God so loved the world He gave His only begotten son to die for us, so that whoever believes in Him may not perish but have eternal life. This is just one of the six hundred and odd verses that talk about love in the Bible. I am convinced that God is madly in love with you and me. :) But sometimes we may not always feel His love. So, mark out people who love you. Stay in constant touch with these people so you don’t run out of your supply of love. This is a conscious choice, because we tend to give more attention to people who trample us and take people who love us for granted; when it should have been the other way round.

The second basic necessity of life encouragement can also be received from God. The next person who must encourage you all the time is – yourself. After all you spend maximum time with yourself more than anybody else. So when you get up in the morning don’t wait for something inspiring to happen. Or something exciting to come and hit you so you feel happy. More often than not there are more things to bring you down than there are to lift you up. So it is your responsibility to have a positive attitude.

It is also nice if you can take the responsibility to help people around you to gain a positive attitude.   This will definitely make you a leader. So in addition to my definition - A leader is also “A person who can plant hope right into the hearts of the people who seek” (Dr. David Yonggi Cho in the book 4^th dimensional living in a 3 dimensional world).

So you who are reading this – check yourself. Mark out the people who you can influence and make it your everyday habit to bless them, plant hope in their hearts, give them a sense of purpose in their lives, and don’t forget to do all of the above to your own self, too. Many want to follow but few are born to lead. How about you?

Be not afraid to change

Infants hate change. They love to cling to familiar people and familiar environment. They grow pretty scared and upset with even the slightest change. Sometimes this spills into adulthood. We have set patterns and routines. For eg. Some of us have cupboards overflowing with clothes but end up wearing the same few dresses over and over again because we imagine it “suits” us. Familiar things give us a sense of safety. But between the two which one would you like to have as a middle name – safety or adventure?

So, be not afraid to change……

1)      Your dreams What happens when you have to change your life’s dream? Say you wanted to be a doctor and ended up being a pharmacist, an army officer but ended up being an architect or a fashion designer and ended up being a home maker... Is it the end of the world? ; Of course not! Sometimes what you thought you should do might have been just because “everybody else is doing it”. These dreams will never have the necessary fuel to come to fruition. You’ll keep talking about it but you won’t get it done. (Sounds familiar?) So, if there are plans/ dreams that are going stale in your closet, dump them. It is the old adage; don’t spend your time looking at a door that won’t open, that you don’t notice the door that is standing wide open. Find what works for you and keep doing it diligently. Don’t worry about what people would think – People are just people NOT God.

2)      You  There is one more transformation you shouldn’t be afraid to make. The changes you must make to adapt to a new environment. Say, you are from a place where no one cared how you dressed/ what you ate/ how you socialized etc., and then you land up in the upscale environment of Navy. Don’t be an infant clinging to old patterns. Change; not your principles, rather your persona. (Your character is what will remain with you throughout eternity. So don’t mess with that.) But the way Navy hones your personality is truly rich. Don’t miss the opportunity. The quicker you adapt to Navy the easier it is on your hubby who I am sure you want to please. And the end results are always the best.

A small tip - One sure shot way of pushing useless repetition out of your life is - Doing at least one thing you have never done before, every week. This way your life would have variety and you’ll be the change in your area of influence. 

Let Go and Let it be

Humans have this innate instinct to be in control. What is wanting to be in control? – Have power over, be in command, direct etc., I define being in control as ‘Wanting to be God’ :) We want control over the people we love; we want surety that they will give us support; we want control over our lives and make sure nothing goes wrong; and when we are a little too young we also want everything and we want all that right here, right now; we worry about what people think of us; we worry if we have been everywhere and accomplished everything and so on :)

The fact is, God has given but a little control in our hands. The ability to choose - This is all we have. What happens as the result of our choices is beyond human comprehension leave alone control.

It is as though, we are put on earth to just find our place and do our job, make choices every single day and that is it! The Bible says, through worrying about tomorrow you cannot even make a single strand of your hair grow. Being in control is the opposite of the very nature of our existence. We can be leaders, responsible, accountable, pioneers but never in full control. Full control is God’s work. You and I can simply follow what is right and keep doing it. Of course, we can dream and think positive. We can project a bright future in our minds and see it take place in reality after a while but we can never control how our dreams get fulfilled. That is again, God’s work :)

At times when my thinking is running faster than light I stop and feel the pulse in my left wrist with the fingers on my right hand. My pulse goes pretty steady. Evenly spaced, small pulses that show I am alive, my body is functioning fine and I am healthy. This simple exercise puts an abrupt end to my controlling attitude. I realize that I cannot control my OWN heart. I don’t tell my heart to beat at a certain rate, make sure the blood reaches all the parts of my body and blah blah blah. Boy! Am I glad I am not responsible for all this intricate stuff! If I was handed the job of controlling my heart I would have done a pretty shoddy work and killed myself by now :) I actually rejoice that a God who is FAR more intelligent and perfect than me is running the show from behind the scenes.

Although we don’t have full power, the power of personal choice is real and available to us. We are actually capable of making counter-conscience wrong choices and land up in hell. This is why being connected to your heart is important. Being aware of what is right and wrong, and choosing right is important. Constantly analyzing and correcting the path that you've chosen is important.

If there are things in your life that aren't working the way you’d like them to, please don’t go crazy trying to fix them. If there are things to be changed in you, then change them. Do your best. Beyond that, let go and let it be. In the light of a calm heart, which is conscience driven, you will find the solution kept for your problem by God. Wait until then. God bless.