Have you have heard of grace marks ? Fills you with memories about school days doesn't it ? You have an exam. You are trying hard to cram all you can for it. You have no clue what you are going to get in your exam paper the next day. You make calls to the (otherwise ignored) first benchers. You forget to eat lunch, dinner and breakfast. Your parents and your nasty older sibling go "tch tch" at you when they see you cramming formulas at 3 am. And the D-Day arrives and the question paper looks like its in a foreign language. Well. You press on give it your best shot and fill as many extra sheets as you can. Making up with quantity for the lack of quality.
You come out of the exam hall and run away from all the first benchers who have this smug look on their faces and take refuge in your "gang" who make you feel better by giving a thumbs down sign with a "king of the world" look on their faces. :)
You decide to have selective amnesia about the exam until Mrs. XYZ revives your memory with a bundle of sheets containing more red circles than blue letters on them. Now, you walk to the teacher's table with real trepidation anticipating something less than 50. And your fears become a nasty reality - 49/100. Teacher gives you a loud voiced reprimand that would scare even a bull dog. Then she calms down (more to control her BP than out of any pity for you) and looks at the paper one more time HOPING to find SOMETHING worthy. Then for reasons unknown to all humanity she puts a +2 near the 49/50 and hands you the paper.
That is grace marks.
Once you grow up you hardly ever think of grace marks. But you get it all the time !
You deserve to have died under that bus for over-speeding yet you dint. You deserve to have not had your dad/mom/child/hubby/wife/friend come back and kiss you after what you did but they did. You get grace marks all the time. Grace is getting what you don't deserve.
Getting grace marks is fun. It gives you hope and relief and you resolve to do better next time. But GIVING grace marks. Oh THAT is another thing altogether. We'd rather keep account of all the things done wrong to us. We'd rather hold the grudge than let go. We'd rather think through over and over about the close friend who betrayed us or that stranger who hurt us. We'd rather be bitter and think all possible negative thoughts about that person than just let go.
Life is simpler when we give grace marks. People are always measuring relationships. Has he given me this much when I have given him that much? Has she done this when I have done that? How can he/she do that when all I have done is only good ? We can easily fall into the victim mentality. Instead, be the teacher and give them grace marks. Don't try to cut them down, level them up. Ten years down the line they'd still remember you as one who showed them grace. 'Cos grace is a seed sown in love. It will bear fruit in the person someday.
And don't forget to count your grace marks. You'll be surprised how much you have scored more than you deserve.
And don't forget to count your grace marks. You'll be surprised how much you have scored more than you deserve.
